my journey of self discovery
When I was in middle school I was not a very popular person, my only outlet was band an even there I didn't truly fit in. It wasn't until my freshman year of band camp where I finally felt as if I had found my sanctuary. Band camp was an endless support group of friends, where everyone had each other's backs and sincerely cared about how you felt, and this was a very new sensation to me, because I had always been the outcast. Back then I was still struggling with coming out, although most everyone knew, it was just a matter of me being able to accept it. A few of the upperclassmen had caught on and helped me come to terms with it. So of course I was ecstatic that I could finally open up about who I was, I thought I had found an identity. Of course looking back now i've realized I had sold myself too short, for I am many things aside from just what my sexuality is. I am also a passionate musician, a good friend, a student (more or less.) and I am constantly broadening my horizons, always learning more about who I am. So as for the question of "who am I?" Well to me, that's an open ended question, with ever changing answers, or at least it should be, because that shows growth and depth of character.
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My Points of prideThis here is my shadow box which holds all of the band related rewards and memories I have accumulated from middle school to senior year of band. One of the awards that I am particularly proud of that I almost won consecutively each year is "Most Blonde." Which I think is a good representation of my high school career.
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I have never been an honor roll student, not for lack of intelligence, but for lack of drive. Some people take pride in their perfect four point, but I have always gravitated towards more creative outlets such as band. I like to think that I have a natural taken for my instrument(s), but a lot of it comes from my hours of practicing, which has never felt like a chore or homework to me, because I just love playing music so much. I know I'm not the only one who does not enjoy school work what so ever, but school has always felt like something I have to do with no real end result. So something I take pride in is my music, I would never want to perform something that I haven't practiced to near perfection. Just like how some students wouldn't hand in half completed assignments. In band we only have two concerts a year, which means we spend all that time trying to perfect the music we play in order to put on a good show for our friends and family. It may seem as if those two one hour long concerts aren't worth all of the unseen effort put into it. But for the one hour you get to see the joy you bring to people's faces when they hear that iconic Beatle's song or when they hear the most beautiful music they have never heard of before, and is now their nee favorite song. That is why I take such pride in anything band related.
my advice:
The most commonly given advice to incoming freshmen is to take their freshman year seriously, and not just "pass" their classes, but to excel and get really good grades. In order to set down a good foundation for the rest of their high school career. This is one thing I would have done differently, because I was still so stuck in my mindset of "oh it doesn't really matter," that I couldn't see the big picture, and I could't see any future past where I currently was. Another thing I would have done differently is to have affiliated myself with better people, because it's really true that you can tell a lot about a person based off of the people they carry around with them. Always associate yourself with those who build you up and never break you down, because in high school aside from your family your best support group is going to be those who you call your friends. Friends also play a huge role in what shapes you, and determines how you will treat others. But also as important all your friends may seem to be to you in school, chances are that after graduation you won't see most of those people ever again.
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"As I get older, I am more selective of who I consider a friend. I find that I would rather have four quarters than one hundred pennies." |
"I'm never gonna use this outside of high school so what's the point?"
I used to ask this question all the time, and every time the teachers would never really give a direct answer. As I've grown I think I have began to realize the the point is. Math class is so much more than just learning how to add and subtract, it teaches you how to critically think and problem solved and sometimes how to work with others to find an answer. English teaches us how to read between the lines and not take everything for face value and teach timeless life lessons from all of those "boring" books we were forced to read. History teaches us to be more accepting of other cultures, and have an appreciation for the things we have today from what has happened in the past. Schools purpose is not to teach us how fast the speed of light travels (299,792 kilometers per second btw) but to give us the tools to work together with others, to problem solve and to be able to function in normal society once we graduate. I am proud to say that I think Laingsburg High School has done a very good job at that.
I decided to add this because as important as school is, I know I am still going to leave not knowing how to do a lot of things which is why once I've graduated I won't be done learning, but now learning more essential life skills and because of the foundation I have acquired from school is why i'll be able to do so.
Pieces from this year that i am proud of:
This was a poem I wrote at about one AM on the day that it was due after a disagreement with my mom which inspired the poem.
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I believe this was one of our very first poetry assignments and I was so excited to write it and it was inspired by my work experiences.
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Colors was another poem in which I got my idea to write it from real life. I've always liked having colorful hair and that's where I got the inspiration for this weekend.
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